The Three E's

The Three E's... About 6 years ago my very close friend Rosa became pregnant. She was my first friend to have a baby so everything about having a baby was completely foreign to me. So I decided that I would read all her pregnancy books with her so we could talk about it even though I wasn't pregnant. Of course Rosa rushed right out and purchased the classic What to Expect When You Are Expecting book. As her pregnancy progressed and we got further and further into the book we decided that neither one of us wanted anything to do with the terms that began with the letter E. Those words being, enema, episiotomy, and epidural. I'll have you all know that I have not forgotten those words over the past 6 years and now that they are possibly around the corner I am doing everything in my power to steer clear of them! :)

I feel very fortunate to be able to say that I have never spent any time in the hospital. When I was about 5 years old I was bit by a horse and had to get stitches in my finger but other than that trip to the ER I have never been back for anything other than the occasional immediate care visit for the flu or something common like that. Before becoming pregnant I can only recall giving blood one time when I had stomach issues and that was so traumatic I said I was never going back to the doctor again. I have tried to take medicine and it makes my stomach turn so I quit taking prescriptions for anything- I'll survive. Oh and just to add a little story about pills: I was on a prescription from the dermatologist once (desperate times call for desperate measures I looked like I was 12) and apparently I didn't swallow the pill with enough water so the capsule dissolved in my throat and backed up into my sinuses and out my nose. I was foaming at the nose and my throat was on fire. Milan had to call poison control at midnight. I survived but my throat and nose were both burned from it. Dave lovingly calls me "green snot" now. Nice. Anyway, I have tried taking vitamins and we all know from a previous blog that I am incapable of that as well. I refuse to take over the counter medicaton for a cold (remember when I puked Nyquil all over you mom?) nor will I take aspirin or any of that stuff. It too makes my stomach turn. When it comes right down to it I am a complete wreck. I prefer pain over intervention.

Onto another subject... Gestational diabetes testing. During the third trimester they make you go in and get tested for diabetes. I do have to say for the record that I am getting better at giving blood. After much practice of mental relaxation I can now give blood without getting an upset stomach. I really am proud of myself. Anyway, the doctor told me to eat like normal that day- so I did (no Twizzlers of course). I went in drank my bottle of "kool-aid" and waited the full boring hour until they could draw blood. Two weeks later I go in for my visit and I'm told I didn't pass the test. What? Ok, imagine me freaking out about this. All I can see is visions of Twizzlers dancing in my head. I am told to come into the office the next day for the 3 hour test. Oh my god, three hours! I had to fast after midnight. I have never fasted in my life. I honestly thought I was going to die the next morning without my breakfast and water. Anyway, I get to the office, they draw blood, and I drink that nasty sweet drink again. You can't walk around or leave so you just sit for an hour until they can draw your blood again. You do this for a total of 3 hours. Oh did I people watch! But that's another story. In the end, I was nauseous, thirsty, starving, and my arm hurt from all the needle poking! But none the less I survived. Now I get to wait for the big news of whether I have diabetes or not. I knew that if I did I wasn't going to be able to forgive myself for all those Twizzlers I ate. Finally after a long few days of waiting I call the office and the nurse tells me that my numbers came back really low and everything looks great. WHAT? Then why on earth didn't I pass the first test? Come to find out at my appointment today I was only one point above normal so it automatically pushed me into the 3 hour test requirement. Are you kidding me! As ridiculous as all of this may sound to the average person you need to see that to me that is traumatic. :)

Back to the three E's. I waited to get pregnant for many reasons but the biggest reason had to do with the fact that it requires me to have medical things done. Now that I have survived two root canals and crowns put on my teeth I knew I had graduated into the world of being a big girl. If I can get a root canal done certainly I can have a baby. If you have never had a root canal done then make sure you are taking extra special care of your teeth so you don't need one done. It is terrible. Here's another look into the life of Jen. When I was 23 I had my wisdom teeth removed. How bad could that be? Oh how naive I was! I was nervous but I honestly don't get as afraid at the dentist as I do at the doctor. Anyway, I sit in the chair and suddenly I am being strapped down and givin a big needle in my arm. I immediately start crying. I don't know what came over me but I had no control of myself. The nurse had to wipe my eyes and nose because my hands were strapped down. It was pathetic and scary. The next thing I know the surgery is over and they are waking me up. What do you think the first thing I did was? Cried of course. I started crying all over again. It was as if I had never been out. I picked up right where I left off! You would have thought I had lost a limb and not 4 teeth. Anyway, back to the three E's.

After I found out I was pregnant the first thing I did was get a bunch of books to read. I knew I had 9 months to psych myself up for this. Fortunately the lady I babysit for had just given birth to twins so she was my daily resource for pregnancy conversation. It wasn't long before she was sharing her own stories and suggesting reading material. Little did I know that my meeting her would change my entire outlook on giving birth. I didn't know people actually gave birth without the 3 E's. I also didn't know that my list of things to be afraid of would be much longer than my little list of the 3 E's. The most powerful thing for me has been learning that I have control over the interventions that happen at my birth. You don't have to do things just because that's the way the hospital tells you to do it or that's the way most women today do things. I felt so liberated learning about this and reading all of the material supporting and encouraging natural child birth. Remember... I am the girl who would choose pain over intervention. In my quest for a birth that I can handle I have hired a doula and found birth classes that support and encourage natural child birth. Over the past 7 months I have bombarded Milan with snippets of info from all of the books I have read and he is completely on board with me for this journey. It is a journey much different than my friends have taken but I do believe it is one woman were created to do without too much unnecessary intervention.

I had planned to share my funny birth class stories tonight but it seems as though I have gone off on a tangent. I will save my stories for another day. Taking traditional birth classes at the hospital and taking alternative birth classes are much different and we are totally enjoying the experience. I will paint the picture for you next time. I hope you enjoyed my chatter. I needed to get it out! :)